Hi Guys
Had a great day today apart from one little incident I'll tell you about later!
Started with breakfast at church followed by our all age nativity service. The chapel was packed, the singing at typical WNL full blast and the kids were just fantastic in the play. How amazing that over 2,000 years since a little baby was born in a shed we are still telling the story in a little village in Bedfordshire. Third advent candle was lit today; only ten days to go till the big one!
After church we decided to go out for lunch met someone we knew (who shall remain nameless) who felt honour bound to launch into a list of all those he knew with cancer and details of a friend on her last legs in a nearby hospice. Well intentioned I'm sure, but not really what I wanted to talk about in front of my wife and two youngest kids. The future may be very difficult but at the moment life is reasonably normal and we want to keep it that way. Some may think we're in denial and they'd be right. Why yield to the misery of it all? As things stand it's just great to be around, celebrating Christmas and confounding oncologists with my progress. Any Christmas is special with a family but especially one you where you were told that on average with this cancer you wouldn't see.
Don't get me wrong; happy to talk to anyone about how I am, I give updates daily to those who care but not got a lot of time to worry too much about where this all might lead. People are split into three camps 1) those who act as though my snuffing it is imminent (they may be right but can bog off), (2) those who are convinced I'm totally healed (sweet concept, but being real with them is impossible) and (3) those who just live in the moment with us (gold medal for this group). To quote a pertinent line from the recent film 'Kung Fu Panda' (bear with me on this...) Yesterday is over, tomorrow is a mystery but today is a gift and that is why they call it the present! Bit schmaltzy I know but how we intend to live in 2009; for the moment. Apologies in advance if we end up not being as committed to things as we have been. Can't help feeling if I'd put my health, sanity and family before other things I might not be where I am now. So if we don't fancy doing something we just won't (terrible admittance from me born with a heavy dose of terminal 'can't let people down' guilt but there you go).
It's amazing looking back at the amount of times conversations in the past year with others have been more about them facing their own mortality (through me as a friend being ill) or re-living the loss of someone they loved. I understand; it's not easy - I wouldn't have known what to say either!
So guys, sorry to sound off and please don't worry about talking to me about the big 'C' however I don't want preparing for death, I don't want to be declared a miracle I just want to laugh, drink some wine, be well enough in the spring to mess about in my boat, tend my garden and might even hit the gym again! Want to play silly games with my kids, go to France (LOTS) build sand castles, fly kites and eat without any food getting stuck (like it ISN'T at all this Christmas but was a lot LAST Christmas). I want walk Rosie dog round the lake, be stupidly publicly infatuated with my perfect wife and find some more mates to have a laugh with. think I might create a 'Dave and friends weekly beer appreciation group'. Any takers???? Also looking forward to getting back to work fully which I shall be if the early January full body scan is clear.
Thanks to everyone for being there for us in 2008, family (all heroes), friends at Wootton New Life (ever pateint, caring and supportive) and our best mates Nick & Sarah Hearn and John & Amanda Stamp for living with us in the moment.
See ya guys - hope today's blog wasn't too heavy....
Dave
Sunday, December 14, 2008
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2 comments:
Very well said Jewish Pappa,
Living in the present is definitely what we're doing, and what we're doing correctly! I was reminded recently of a verse and it says ... (Mr Theology) "So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."
See EVEN God says it's what we MUST do! Ill or not.
Oh and for that Dave Beer -drinking friends thing!!?? Yes please!!
It's been one heck of a year but!! IF anybody can defeat another new year it's my jewish Pappa and Momma! I know we know that it's going to be diffeicult but we've all seen healing! At least I have. You've even got people going back to church! I see healing there!!
"just keep swimming!..." some turtles may get in the way...but just 'bop' em off you track!" (so much for uplifting and encouraging from our brothers eh? (excuse my openness...Im Scottish!)
I mean nobody has been guaranteed a whole life. We all gotta watch out for that bus.
Love You. <-- yeah yeah I know.
>>correction<< when I said to defeat another year, I don't want to sound like I'm number 2 on the list (2)" those who are convinced I'm totally healed"
I mean the New Year is a new month and we take every day as it comes... =) so here's to 2009!
Chlo Chlo xx
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